But It Hurts: My Latest Awkward Massage Experience

To ring in the New Year with some peace and R&R my partner and I decided to go away for the weekend and get massages. It’s actually been a while since I had gotten a really good therapeutic healing style massage - the kind that gets you reflecting on your decisions in life and maybe even tearing up a bit. In fact, the last time I got one was when I lived in Singapore and got a traditional thai massage.

Most of the time it's usually my partner who likes to get massages on a regular. I’m a firm believer that most “high-end” spas don’t house the best therapist (they give you the feel good lotion types of massages). When I received mine a few weeks ago - I could have sworn the owner of the spa and therapist was going to give me the most mind blowing massage I will ever have in my life - he did everything right the first 15 min. Even began chanting and doing a combination Reiki session for my “knot busting” request. It felt rather nice, he wasn’t talking too much and asked if "I was feeling alright" - that is the first 10 minutes. Then suddenly, things took for an interesting turn - the strokes got deeper and more painful hoping that my ever so calm loud “ouch” would signal for him to take it easy. I even said “that’s a little painful” - but did he stop? No! He continued to make it more painful and exclaimed “deep work will release the tension and pressure, just breathe through it”. “Well if I could breathe I would.....you ignorant therapist, can’t you see am in pain here”! Okay, so I didn’t say that but I wanted to.

At that point, I was so disappointed it didn’t matter what I said, he didn’t listen anyway so I tuned him out and went to an Island in my mind to get through the remainder of what felt like a lifetime but 30 more minutes. I am a licensed therapist, myself and I am amazed at the many massage enthusiasts that are convinced that the more painful the massage, the better it is for you! If you are of that mindset, my question to you is, "If deep tissue "knot-busting" massage therapy is so effective, why do you need to keep going back for more?" There are many massage therapists out there that make you feel pain--intentional and unintentional--convincing you they're doing something good for you. And you believe it - I did!

Well, you won't get that from me but I can’t massage myself now can I? I pride myself on giving a pain-free massage that is as effective, if not more so, on your trigger points (knots) as the often painful "deep tissue" therapy you've been convinced you need. I do not do "light touch," either but honest, real, healing massage therapy, with varying degrees of depth and pressure, according to the technique I am using on the part of your body I'm working with.

Healing massage therapy is meant to release stress from your entire body, only going "deep" when your muscles are ready for it not when your therapist feels like it. That is why most sessions should last longer than what they offer at spas nowadays. You are never suppose to be sore or in pain. In fact, it's just the opposite. you should walk away feeling amazed at how wonderful you feel, inside and out, for days afterward. I mean we experience enough pain in life, physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. Why pay and endure for more? I mean I know I said that I will not settle for the meaning of life, rather opt for the intense experience of it but not that intense!